One Student Parent Shares the Impact of the Crisis

Lesley Del Rio | May 12, 2020 | Aspen Postsecondary Success for Parents

This op-ed by Lesley Del Rio, an Ascend Parent Advisor for the Aspen Postsecondary Success for Parents Initiative, was published on April 9, 2020 by Imaginable Futures, an Ascend Network Partner.

Life as we know it has been turned upside down. As a student parent, I am working on my associate degree while being a full-time mom, I knew my responsibilities were delicately balanced, but the recent disruptions to everyday life have shown me just how much instability threatens to topple everything.

As the days of sheltering in place have turned into weeks, I’m now facing months of managing how to work and learn from home while being a full-time mom. Strangely, it’s not the fear of getting sick or the challenges of transitioning my son to remote learning that’s causing me the most stress. It’s the uncertainty. Not knowing how long this will last, what is coming next, or if I am doing enough to prepare—these are the thoughts constantly running through my head.

In many ways, I’m one of the lucky ones. I am able to work from home and my school was online to begin with. My son’s school district began online learning this week. I’m grateful we are still healthy and live in a place where we can enjoy the outdoors. Even still, it has been incredibly difficult to adjust to the new reality and the last few weeks have meant searching for a new sense of balance in my life—shifting my priorities, setting new routines, and establishing new expectations for myself and my son. All while every day brings new questions and new uncertainty.

I know I’m not alone.

There are millions of student parents out there: nearly a quarter of all students who are enrolled in undergraduate are also parents. We are also some of the most impacted by these uncertain times, because we feel the effects on every level: not only are our kids home from school, childcare has been disrupted, the campus resources many of us relied on are less accessible, and we face uncertainty in our employment and economic instability. Even as one of the 25% of student parents who study exclusively online, I have observed the need for continued innovation and greater flexibility around how we all learn.

Largely, student parents exist in an education ecosystem that was not designed with our needs in mind. It’s an ecosystem that often overlooks us or leaves us behind, into which we must find ways to fit ourselves, rather than the system providing the flexibility and accommodations we need. Yet despite this, when we have the chance, we are thriving members of our postsecondary institutions, bringing invaluable perspectives and unique motivations to our classrooms, whether they are in-person or virtual.

The uncertainties we face right now are not necessarily new, but they have reflected, magnified, and exacerbated the barriers we face in our day-to-day lives. As we all come to terms with our new normal and look toward solutions to get us through, I carry with me the hope that we can come out of this situation with solutions that have longer term effects than just alleviating the stressors of the current moment.

If there was one thing I could have right now, more than anything, it would be certainty: to know when this current crisis will end, so I am able to make plans for the meantime, work toward them, and maintain stability in my and my son’s life.

In the absence of this impossibility, I want educational institutions, organizations, businesses and decision-makers to at least consider our voices as they adjust plans for today and the future. I know we can’t meet all needs for everyone, and there are no right or easy answers in the situation we face, but there is comfort, strength, and grace in respect. And the best solutions come about when a mix of voices are heard.

And this shouldn’t just be in times of crisis.

We deserve to have solutions that address the unique needs of student parents now, and solutions designed for us in the long-term. With the right support, student parents can reach our goals, rise, and create progress for our families and communities for generations to come. We deserve that chance—and that begins with hearing us.

Related Posts

In an Inside Higher Ed article, David Croom and Generation Hope provide important perspective into why the student parent population is important for higher education institutions to prioritize.
Media MentionsMay 9, 2023
Photo of student parent Waukecha Wilkerson with her family at her graduation ceremony.
Today, Ascend at the Aspen Institute (Ascend) released the second season of “1 in 5,” its highly rated podcast that explores the multifaceted lives of the one in five college students raising children.
Press ReleasesMay 3, 2023
Photo of Isis Patterson and her family
Growing up, Isis Patterson and her family were constantly operating in survival mode. School offered her the safety and security she lacked at home, so she took a liking to it. When she found out she was pregnant at 15, she kept herself immersed in her schoolwork, graduated with honors, and received a full-ride scholarship …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 10: Meet Isis Patterson Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsApril 25, 2023
1 in 5 Student Parent Podcast
As a child of immigrants, Lourdes saw the efforts her hard-working parents made to give her a memorable childhood, and how they always stressed the importance of education. Then, in high school, Lourdes became pregnant and the birth of her daughter inspired her aspirations for higher education, leading her to a career in nursing. As …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 9: Meet Lourdes Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsApril 17, 2023
Photo of Nicole Alkire Grady with her family in a park.
Nicole Alkire always excelled in athletics and academics at Standing Rock High School in North Dakota. But being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse meant Nicole turned to dating, and eventually alcohol, to cope with the trauma. In high school, she became a mother and worked hard to graduate – leaning on the support of …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 8: Meet Nicole Alkire Grady Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsApril 4, 2023
Photo of Generation Hope's Nicole Lynn Lewis with her five children
Today, Nicole Lynn Lewis is an accomplished author, CEO of Generation Hope, and mother of five. But she didn’t always feel a sense of stability and pride. When she arrived on campus with her three-month old daughter, she instantly felt out of place and didn’t know who to turn to for help. Her feelings of …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 7: Learn About Generation Hope Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsMarch 28, 2023
Today, Ascend at the Aspen Institute (Ascend) released the second season of “1 in 5,” its highly rated podcast that explores the multifaceted lives of the one in five college students raising children.
Press ReleasesMarch 20, 2023
Dominique Baker and her family.
Dominique Baker married her high school sweetheart and planned to pursue a degree in social work, but her first semester in college proved to be both financially and mentally exhausting. As her family grew and Dominique took stock of the things she wanted for herself and her two children, she made the decision to leave …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 6: Meet Dominique Baker Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsMarch 19, 2023
Today, Ascend at the Aspen Institute announced that eight Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs) and Tribal Colleges and Universities (TCUs) have joined its Black and Native Family Futures Fund.
Press ReleasesDecember 13, 2022
Photo of Yolanda Johnson-Peterkin.
Yolanda Johnson-Peterkin was taught to always take care of those around her, but didn’t always see education as a way of doing so After dropping out of school and later finding herself incarcerated and pregnant, Yolanda became determined to change the course of her life. Once she was released, Yolanda focused on establishing a relationship …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 5: Meet Yolanda Johnson-Peterkin Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsDecember 1, 2022
Photo of Drayton Jackson and his family.
Drayton Jackson experienced homelessness for almost 20 years. Today, Drayton utilizes his lived experience to advocate for others in a similar position—but it wasn’t always easy adjusting to having a seat at the table. Drayton, now the father of eight, is setting boundaries and goals for himself to achieve a healthy work-life balance. Along with …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 4: Catching up with Drayton Jackson Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsDecember 1, 2022
1 in 5 Student Parent Podcast
Soren’s interest in higher education has always been rooted in an interest in the environment, even from childhood. As an adult, after struggling with their own mental health, Soren became interested in psychology, and pursued jobs in the medical field, but was soon discouraged by the for-profit medical system. Soren went through challenging transitions in …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 3: Meet Soren Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsDecember 1, 2022
Photo of Ignacio Angel and his family.
Ignacio Angel has decided to define for himself what success looks like as a college student and father of four. The for-profit trade school he went to, which was later investigated for preying on vulnerable students, never delivered on promises of a job, and landed him in debt. With Lilly’s help, he found a support …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 2: Meet Ignacio Angel Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsDecember 1, 2022
Photo of Daria Willis and her family.
Dr. Daria Willis brings her extensive education and her own experience as a student parent to her role as president of Howard Community College in Columbia, Maryland. Daria had her daughter, Lyric, during her first year in college. She shares how keenly she felt the social stigma of being a single parent. It took a …

‘1 in 5’ Season 2 Episode 1: Meet Daria Willis Read More »

Aspen Postsecondary Success for ParentsDecember 1, 2022
Today, Ascend at the Aspen Institute (Ascend) released the second season of “1 in 5,” its highly rated podcast that explores the multifaceted lives of the one in five college students raising children.
Press ReleasesDecember 1, 2022